simple made special

Halloween, or the day the bear came to the house

on Halloween, our baby had the thrill of her young life when a bear, an actual BEAR rang our doorbell and grunted trick or treat. it was awesome. I totally get Halloween.

 

 

 

see ya summer

convention is upon us!

I don't know how many conventions I have worked on. At least one a year since 2003? For those who don't know, it's very common for multi-level marketing companies to gather their leaders and people yearly for training, education, new product launches and recognition. It is a very busy time, it takes 2-3 months to get ready for the 3 day event, with most of the work happening in the last few weeks. This year I have been busy designing new product packaging for launch, creating signage, a new product catalog, 24 page magazine, a holiday catalog and a variety of other things I'm too tired to think about. Tomorrow is the last day of doTERRA's event. It will be a long one for David, who is shooting from 9am until midnight, and for me because I will help him a little here and there and tear down the product displays we built.

here is a banner (dave's photo, my design)

here are some products I've worked on, again Dave's images:

and an old, old photo of me from another convention...

 

13 months

The day after her birthday, baby got really serious about talking. She specializes in animal noises, with an emphasis on farm animals. When asked, or shown a picture she can:

mmmmmm (moo for cow)

bahhhh

breathe heavily through her nose (for pig)

growl and raise her arms (for bear)

bop bop (for any bird)

waggle her tongue side to side (for turkey)

pfffft (tries to make elephant noises)

arf arf—this is by her favorite. she loves seeing and hearing dogs

ma ma (sometimes for me, sometimes for food, or for dad)

bear (when she sees our bear cookie jar or her stuffed bear)

beep, beep for cars

bye bye (I think, it might be beep, beep)

It's really funny, and of course I think she's a genius. Today for the first time at a restaurant, she wiggled out of my arms and wanted to be down walking all over. That's really different for her, and kind of nice.

Her favorite toys are her books (books = genius baby), especially the farm animal books and her Richard Scary Biggest, Busiest Book ever. She turns right to the zoo page and the farm page. I love this book, the drawings are too good. I tried to draw some of the cars like he does, it was not pretty. We're happy and keeping very busy with work. I vacillate from thinking I'm the luckiest person ever, because I can work from home, to wanting to roll on the floor, kicking and screaming, ripping my hair out. It's feast or famine, but it's so good. We're coming up on our busiest time of the year, so that's exciting and overwhelming. I feel like I can accomplish anything this year, because I don't have a colicky newborn and I'm getting a full night's sleep. Woohoo! 

blerg

Why the last 3 weeks have been weird/confusing/scary/depressing: One night, at bedtime, instead of the usual routine of nursing then sleeping, the baby bit me. It was so unexpected and she had never done it before. She was just cutting her top teeth. I yelped. It upset her very much and she refused to eat and was just acting mad and tired, so I put her to bed. Later that night when it was time for her 3am feeding, she arched away from me and was screaming, so I just rocked her back to sleep. Same thing in the morning, and later that morning and the rest of the day. This is my baby that nurses 10 times a day. This was weird, I mean way weird. I googled, I facebooked, I went to 2 doctors. Days passed, no nursing. I went to a la leche league meeting, I called my lactation consultant. Nothing is working. So she has been living on solids and pumped milk for 3 weeks. I really hate it, but I am accepting it and at least I haven't cried myself to sleep for a few days. 

I have been hoping this was a nursing strike, and maybe it was, but have you met my baby? She's just a touch determined. I'm trying to see the bright side. She's napping well, happy for the most part, sleeping great at night (as in, she just started sleeping through the night), enjoying solid food, and almost a year old... so maybe this is just her time. I just never thought this is how it would happen.

I am sad. I am trying to move on. 

Here she is a few months ago.

hello world

What has the baby been up to, you ask?

1. Taking awesome naps. Praise Jesus. Naps make for a happier baby and good hairdos. 

2. Enjoying the outdoors in between squalls. 

3. Gnawing on radishes fresh from the garden. Radish=hillbilly teether, and boy, has she been a teethin'. Growing teeth can be rough business.

4. Sliding. She can climb up the slide al by herself, it's the going down that requires assistance. Her feet stick to the slide and she's libel to go head over diaper.

5. Eating. Here's more garden goodies. She loves her roughage. No, I don't think that's why she has diarrhea, why do you ask? Please note the teeth, all the better for gnawing.

That is all. She also has a birthday coming up, but we mustn't think of that just yet, it's too weird, and this teething business has put a hold on any sort of proper party preparations (one must start early when there is only a few minutes a day that can be used for such efforts).  So there will be a party of sorts. Make that a celebration!!! Will you come, please?

 

may flowers

We sure love our baby. She will be 11 months old in a few days, which is really hard to process. We took this picture today. I think I really needed some sunshine and flowers. I've been watching this clump of purple flowers bloom in a field for a few years, they are so pretty right now, it's on center street.

Little girl likes to jabber, scream and speak in tongues, she is babbling so sweetly most of the time, and then there are times when she is mad... I think she must be getting another tooth. She is pretty wonderful and doing some funny things. She is copying things... she will ring a bell, comb her dad's hair and use a back scratcher. Yes, I love a good back scratcher. She is very good at responding to 'no-no'. Her favorite food is cheese (so much for my baby vegan). If I hold her she will nap for about 2 hours which is amazing, and nights are getting better, so I'm feeling a little more human. She loves the dirt and being outside. I love her so much, I feel so lucky everyday.

So much love.

two special girls

One of the dearest people in my world, our midwife, Briana Blackwelder, passed away on Saturday. She was in an automobile accident. I am truly heartbroken.

The first time we met Briana, I was very scared. I was not in a good place emotionally. I had doubts and fears. I found her name online and contacted her after our original midwife decided to leave her practice. We spoke briefly on the phone and arranged a time to meet in her office in Salt Lake. We arrived a little earlier than she, and I watched her pull into the parking lot and get out of her gold bmw wagon, I thought it seemed like the perfect car for a midwife. She was young and so pretty. She had on two different earrings, which I thought was really cool. I never saw her do this again, and I’ve always wondered if it was on purpose, as I now know she often ran on little sleep. We went into her office, a small space with built in shelving, many coats of paint and a pocket door. She had charming little knick knacks, Brian Kershisnik’s “Nativity” print, and a lamp that buzzed and flickered. We sat on the little bed, and she sat on a short stool. She asked us some basic questions, but for the most part she listened. She never looked at her clock, she let her phone bing and vibrate. Her eyes never left ours. She was so present. She was so calm. I was a ball of nerves and she was cool as a cucumber. I talked too much, too fast and managed to say nothing of import. I’m sure I cried at least twice. She spoke a few words, in her collected way, with pauses and thought. She breathed in deeply through her nose and blinked in understanding. She reassured, she bore her belief in homebirth, in women and in me. She told us that many of her clients came to her through circumstances such as ours, she felt it happened for a reason. 

I told Dave on the ride home, “She’s nice, really nice, and that’s enough to go on in most cases."

What I know now is that she was not only a very nice girl, but one of the nicest things that has ever happened to me. She has changed me forever. Because of Briana I am a better mother and a better person. She carried me through one of the hardest times of my life, was there on the proudest day I have ever known, and didn't let me give up on myself when it took eight days for our baby to eat anything. How can you thank someone for that? Harder still, how can you accept that they are gone from this world?

Here is a text message she sent me the night before our baby was born. She hadn't slept because of another birth, and I wanted her to rest as much as she could before she came. This message touches my heart. I want her here.

Here she is, listening to our girl. She said everything was perfect.

Lovingly checking our newborn babe. We have video of this as well, and it is priceless to me, now more than ever.

Here she is checking on us. Please note her eyebrow. My child makes this face at me daily and has since birth.

See what I mean?

We love her, we love her, we love her.

Note: this is my birth team minus our dear Cathy, my brain failed me and I do not have a picture of the 5 of us (why???). David, Briana and Cathy made the best day of my life possible. I owe them each so much. They are each a beacon of love for me.

more days like this please

I am dying for warmer weather so we can get out and play more, baby definitely loves to be outside. She is 9 months old now. She is pulling to standing very well and toddles along furniture a little bit. She crawls fast and is getting more brave and venturing out beyond her usual areas. She is eating less frequently it seems, and doing a little better on solids. She is sprouting her two bottom teeth without much fuss, thank goodness. Nighttime and napping improving all around, we even get an occasional 2 hour nap. I was sure they were a myth.

We are set for summer, found her a very cute rash guard type shirt, hat (seen above) and shorts made from SPF 50 fabric—we're very Victorian about our sun exposure. She also owns a life jacket and Dave's bike is equipped with an iBERT, we just need a little helmet and her birthday to get a little closer and we'll be cruising, I cannot wait! She has a rather fearless little attitude when it comes to speed and movement, which is SO unlike me, so I find it quite thrilling. She loves big pushes in the swing and riding on shoulders. I just love this little girl so much, she surprises me everyday with something—her determination, her energy, her love of velcro, she is just amazing.

 

'if wishes were horses'

huh? I don't know why, but someone near and dear to me uses that expression. I'm pretty sure she means something else, but I'm also pretty sure she might read this, so I better shut up.

I just WISH, wish, wish this photo was in focus. 

This face is killing me. She is a crack-up these days. She is finding her voice, and sometimes it sounds like a little brat-voice. Mostly it's really sweet though. Today I talked into one of her stacking cups and then held it up to her mouth and she would talk into it. We did it for about an hour, it was just fun. She is SO close to crawling it scares me. If not this week, next week I'm guessing. Next she'll be driving. Or asking for a horse.